Monday, January 30, 2012

Looking in the Mirror

Tonight I had a memory flood my mind. I remembered back to when our daughter was just a few weeks old. She weighed less than 10 pounds. Her birthmark was very large and dark red/purple. Her cheek looked like she had a golf ball in her mouth and her eye was swollen closed. I began adding "bella" to the end of her name as a reminder that she is beautiful.

I distinctly remember a morning when I had given our daughter her normal dose of medications and took her with me into the bathroom to wash out her medicine dropper. Her reflection in the mirror caught me off guard. I'm not sure why, but looking at our daughter in the mirror was shocking to me. I cried because I was sad for her future. I wondered how this baby girl would ever be able to look at herself in the mirror as she got ready for school. I feared the ridicule of peers who wouldn't understand why she looked different. I thought about her teenage years and how hard these years are for all girls, much less a girl who looks different from others. I was so sad!

Flash forward two years...
Our daughter just had her second birthday. She is a girlie girl and I was excited to get her some dress-up clothes, hair bows and jewelry to add to her collection. Jason found a full length mirror on sale which thrilled me because I thought it would complete the "dress-up" theme. She could primp and look at herself all day long!

Tonight our little girl got down from the dinner table with a little food (ok, a lot of food) still on her face. She walked up to her new mirror (which still happens to be in the living room) and touched the dirty places on her face. She noticed that her face looked different. All of a sudden I was reminded of my fears from her first few weeks in our lives. I am thankful that her beautiful face is not disfigured. I am thankful for the doctors who knew about the impact a blood pressure medication would have on her birthmarks. I am thankful for her smile and the joy she brings to my life. I am thankful for this experience tonight where I was reminded that our daughter is a miracle!

Thank you for the specific prayers you've prayed for our daughter!

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